Day 14

The England team

Centre backs with as much pace
as my granddad listening to Gardener's Question Time
on his allotment.

A midfield that plods along
like a Des'ree song

wingers like tourists in central London
maps folded out
asking for directions
to Buckin Ham Palace.

A goalkeeper like Boris Johnson
trying to blow a vuvuzela
saying I'm sure there's a knack

wingers like waitresses wearing orthopaedic shoes
carrying a tray of very full champagne glasses

and a substitutes bench as appealing
as a rail replacement service.